Lights, Camera.... ACTION

Immediately after roti, kapda and even before makan there is Bollywood in our lives. The influence that Hindi films have had on our lives is probably dis-proportionate to its overall technical excellence. However when it comes to dialogue-baazi I doubt if it can have competition from any corner of the world. Sample this:


When the son tries to act smart and learns a bit of biology in the bargain:

Beta, main teri maa hoon. Nau maheene maine tujhe is kokh mein pala hai

What did the fifties ki Mom tell her hubby when she was sure about her daughters’ affair?

Suniye jee,………… ab mera shak yakeen mein badal gaya hai

When mother and audience both believe in re-birth:

Mere Karan-Arjun jaroor ayenge

And when a son paid the greatest tribute to motherhood:

Mere paas meri maa hey

Now this guy has to be a born loser or a man with a golden heart:

Kyaa????????...... Tumney mujhe bhai kaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The ultimate middle class tourism fantasy of the parents of sixties:

Bus beti ki shaadi ho jaye, phir hum teerth yatra mein nikal jaenge

The classic hook line of the sixties that spilled over to the seventies as well:

Mein tumhare bache ki maa ban ney waali hoon.

In the sixties what was the best way to get rid of guilt feelings about falling in love?

Pyar kiya naheen jata, ho jata hai.

What does an over-anxious, agonized, anguished, distressed, tortured, tormented, middle-class rustic father of an eighteen year old girl tell his wife in the middle of the night?

Jis ghar mein jawan beti shaadi key layak ho, uske baap ko bhala neend kaisi.

Best way to remember your relatives? Just try molesting a woman:

Kameeney teri maa behen naheen hai kya?

Sure shot way of getting a namaskar. Try rape:

Bhagwan key liye mujhe barbad mat karo Mein tumhare haath jodtee hoon.

When even the ‘bad’ guys had a good soul:

Heads- aspatal chalte hain, tails- bhaag chalte hain.

When two is greater than three:

Ummm…Kitney aadmi thay?


As a kid I laughed at this. Now I feel it is a Rajesh Khanna classic:

Pushpa………I hate tears

When in 7th standard, I realized the transient nature of life (in Utkal Talkies)

Babu moshai, zindagi aur maut upar waale key haath mein hey….

When the seductive courtesan meets the tall-dark-handsome match:

Munni bai key kothe mein log chot khaa key aate hain ya phir chot khaa key jaten hain. Yeh pehela shaks hey jo chot dey ke jaa raha hai.

How does one drop a hint to a garrulous, over talkative, non-stop silly bantering- chattering rustic taangewalli obsessed with the “ I- Me- and- Myself- syndrome”:

Tumhara naam kya hey Basanti?

The crowd felt this too was a classic:

Mard ko dard naheen hota

When Amitabh did a double-deal with the underworld don at an unlikely venue :

Sunaa hai lift key dewaron key kaan naheen hotey

The legendary Devdas on the virtues of alcohol:

Kaun kambakht bardasht karnay ko peeta hai,
hum to peete hain ki…..
behosh ho sakain,
Paroo ko bhula sakain….

When the tragic Devdas gets hounded even by his own mother:

Babuji ne kahaa gaon chhod do,
gaon walon ney kahaa Paro chhod do,
Paro ney kahaa sharaab chhod do,
aaj tumne kah dia, haweli chhod do,
ek din aayega jab wo kahenge,-duniya hi chhod do

When sublime love mustered courage and fought the imperial power of Zille Elahi!!

Anarkali, Salim tujhe marne naheen dega aur hum tumhe jeney naheen denge

When Akbar tries to force Anarkali not only to desert Salim but also convince him that she never was in love:

Anarkali: Jo zabaan unke saamne muhabbat ka iqraar tak na kar saki ho, woh inkaar kaisay karegee?

When the mother tries to dissuade her son:

Jodha Bai: Humara Hindustan koi tumhara dil nahin ek laundi jis pay hukumat kare.
Salim: "Toh mere dil bhi aapka Hindusthan nahin hai, jo aap uspar hukumat kare.

Jai Ho.