The 'three idiots' of St. Vincent’s

As usual I was the first to arrive at the vantage point en route to the restaurant. A long two hour drive through the maddening monsoon drenched Mumbai traffic made me scurry to a nearby bakery selling mouth watering Cakes ‘n’ Croissants. I was enjoying my fusion food (Paneer-Tikka Croissant) and ogling at the variety of cakes on display when Naresh hugged me from behind.

“It’s been 37 long years”, Naresh was saying while Vims, who was just behind him, was beaming from ear to ear proudly seeing his cyber postcard triggering a re-union in flesh and blood. They refused to indulge in cakes and so leaving behind a tempting display, (which also included a beautiful lady in shorts) we trooped out. We headed to the nearby restaurant as enthusiastic as a bunch of pomerian pups out on a evening walk without a leash.

Chilled beer, lemon and soda with salt and sugar (now that’s Vims) and vegetarian delicacies (and this is Naresh) were quickly ordered and we settled down on the real menu - a long gossip session. So long was the session that eventually, in retrospect, I could even discover the hitherto undocumented laws governing re-union gossips.

AB’s first law of gossip:

In a group of three fifty year olds, when there are two with silver white hairs then the guy with black hair becomes a candidate for leg pulling.

“So, you have maintained yourself well,” Naresh said.

“Well ok I should say,” I countered looking at my waist line.

“No, I meant your black hair,” he said. “Must be original,” he mocked.

“Of course no I use hair-dye,” I said. I was trying to sound matter-of-fact, though Naresh was giving me the look which said that I should feel guilty of spreading deception in society.

“Don’t tell me,” Naresh said with mock surprise. “It looks so natural. Must be using an imported brand.”

“Does it help in impressing the ladies?” Now this was Vims in action.

“On the contrary, women get attracted to mature men with silver white hair.” I said desperately trying to deflect their gaze.

Vims shrugged feigning innocence, while Naresh took my diversionary tactics – hook, line, sinker and the fishing rod.

“Yes, YES!!”, he said enthusiastically. “There is this young girl in the 12th standard who has fallen in love with me.”

We went “Nishabdh” as he went on and on about it - the details of which I cannot divulge. However, I was really relieved that my hair dye brand name still remains a secret.

AB’s’ second law of gossip:

If you are reminiscing childhood and are from a convent school you are bound to talk about the girls.

From “Nishabdh” the transition to schooldays was seamless.

Talking about your school after 37 years gives you goose pimples. However, every time you recalled an incident or an event, somehow the discussion meandered on to the girls. Even normal pedestrian queries invariably had feminine reference points.

Question: You were in which class?

Answer: The one which had A, B & C (and all of them are girls)

Question: After school where did you study?

Answer: Khalikote college, English Honours with so-&so, so-&so and so-&so (by now you must have guessed the gender of the so-&-so’s !!!)

There were some who were very fair. Some who were slim. Some with long hairs. Some came in cycles. Some descended from cars. Some from the medical college bus, some painted, some sang, some strummed the guitar, some were studious……. From sister Rosaline to Miss Purnima, from Miss Mabel to Miss Brenda (whom Vims and Louis tracked from Kerala to Delhi) every one was recollected with a fondness that eluded words. Then there were the Garewal sisters (Vims tracked them down to some obscure Punjab town). In between there were references to cricket fields (podiyas), pokohoris, and football tournaments, Hill Patna, Tata choko, Bijipur and Komapalli but they were like time fillers- interludes between the romantic escapism of the 1970’s.

AB’s third law of gossip:

Childhood memories are stronger than the college and post-college days.

Don’t believe me? Sample this:

Naresh: Remember when you came for my reception then there was this girl….

Vims:(Cutting him short) No. I did not come for your reception.

Naresh: Aree kya yaar. It was in Delhi

Vims: When did I even meet you in Delhi?

Naresh: Of course we met in Safdarjung hospital with so&so when we had gone to meet so&so....

Vims: Safdarjung? Or was it Wellingdon?

Naresh: That does not matter.

Vims: But I did not attend your marriage.

Naresh:(Getting agitated) Of course you did not attend my marriage. I was married in Vizag and the reception was in Delhi and I am saying you attended my RECEPTION. Now that you have the video tape you can see yourself and Vani in it……

Hmmm…. fifties here we come!!

AB’s fourth law of gossip (ha ha ...I always knew I could do better than Newton!!):

No matter how jovial one looks everyone has his share of sorrows in life.

Tucked up in the inner recesses of the polychromatic kaleidoscope of our colorful past there are always a few sepia as well as black and white snap shots of pain and sorrow.

The loss of near and dear ones invariably crops up. I must say that through all this talk I saw a different side of Naresh. A facet that made you feel proud of the values in which he has been nurtured. He could have continued with his career in Delhi and searched for lucrative and greener pastures but he decided to come down to Berhampur and work in a back office with a modest salary just to be close to his dad who was battling cancer and missing his son in the last stages of his life. This was indeed touching.

We shifted venue to an ice cream parlour next door. Clicked photos and continued with more gossip. Vani and Shivani dropped by to have dinner in the same restaurant and we said our hello’s to them too. Naresh had to catch an early morning train so we didn’t stretch it late and said our goodbyes bringing to an end a memorable rendezvous.

It was really nice catching up with you, Naresh. May your children fulfill all your dreams and shower their love on you as you have done for your parents.

Well friends, that brings to an end this episode of “How I met Naresh.” Till the time another friend drops in, keep the music going on in svcberhampur.blogspot.com.

Cheers.